Study Smart:First Aid

My Teacher Hates Me

The Problem...

Maria.b, 12, Mississippi

Dear Maria: your teacher hates you? Maybe she does, but maybe she doesn't. Teachers are people. They may like some kids more than others. You may have personalities that clash. Here's the lowdown about teachers and students.

What's Real...

We asked a teacher about this one. Here's what she said. Most teachers are way too busy teaching to waste time and energy hating you. Chances are, your teacher is acting that way to get you to change a behavior they don't like. Your teacher may have the opinion that you are disruptive, lazy, proud or hard to deal with.

Before going any further -- ask yourself these questions:

• Do you take up a really, really big portion of class time all the time?
• Do you call attention to yourself a whole lot?
• Are you the class clown or know-more-than-teach?
• Do you do forget to do the class work?
• Do you tell jokes all the time?
• Do you stare out the window and dream?
• Do you talk or pass notes?
• Are you late a lot?
• Do you leave early?
• Do you show up to class unprepared?
• Do you forget to do your homework or bring your books?

If you answered "yes" to any of these questions, then your teacher is probably trying to tell you something. Change your act. Do the work. Pay attention. Don't do anything to give the teacher grief and they won't give you grief back. If you answered "no" to all these questions, read on.

Taking Action

• Go to your teacher's office hours and have a talk. What is their impression of you?
• Be nice, don't be angry.
• Ask for their honest opinion. Be ready to listen to it.
• If they laugh and say - of course I like you, there is a possibility that you've misread their actions.
• If they tell you that you're a creep in their class, listen to why.
• Don't get mad.
• If they get mad - and say - what's your problem? There's nothing wrong with my class? I love all my students - back off. You doing the talking isn't going to help.
• Now, it's time to bring in your parents to talk to the teacher and the principal. Tell them how you feel.
• When all else fails, ask to transfer classes.
• If the school won't let you transfer, don't give up.
• This class won't last forever. Get over it and go on.
• Remember, you're in class to learn things, not to be the teacher's best friend.
• They're professionals, they understand that.
• If you can do the work and get through with a good grade, you're set for life.
• Ask your parents what they do to cope with people they don't like.
• Chances are, they run into this problem all the time.
• If they don't have any advice, ask the school counselor or a trusted adult.
• Never give up! You are your best resource.