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Are you the next "Dear Abby?" Are you the person everyone goes to for advice? Click here to become an Instant Advice Columnist for "Between Friends!"

 

Get Advice

Got a question about friendship problems you'd like another girl to answer? Click here to send your question in to "Between Friends!" You just might get your question published in our next "Talking About Friends" book!

And check out some past questions here in The Archive:

I Want to Keep My Friend!
Why Do the Friendships End With the Project?

How Do I Tell Her I'm Back to Reality Now?
What Can I Do About My Weepy Friend?
I'm So Jealous of My Talented Friend!
Are My Cousin and I Still Friends?

What Do I Get the Mean Girl For Christmas?
A New School But No New
Friends!
My Friend Is Sooo Emotional!

She Flipped Out Over A Boy I'm Not Dating!
My Friend's Parents Are Divorcing; What Can I Do to Help Her?
Am I Losing My Friend?
Will My Friend Ever Believe Me?
What Should I Do About My Lying Friend?

Should I Make Friends With a Mean Girl?

Which One of Us Is Wrong?
My Best Friend Kissed the Boy I Like!
She Thinks She's Too Good For Me Now!
She Hurts My Feelings and Just Won't Listen!
I Just Have to Know!
How Can I Get My Friend to Myself?

I Don't Want My Friend To Get Hurt!
Are We Friends or Enemies?
I Want Her For a New Best Friend!
How Good a Friend Is She?
I Want Back In!
I Want To Be Like Her...
I Think I Lost Her
No One Likes Me
I Want Some More Friends!
We're Drifting Apart!
My Friend is Getting Weird Over a Boy!
My Friend Has Had It Really Bad!
She Hit Me; Should We Stay Friends?
We Just Keep Arguing!
Can I Tell My Best Friend to Just Hush Up?
She Brags Too Much!

Should I?/ Where'd She Go?
I Want to Get the Two Sides To Talk! / I Want to Go But..!

Next Week

This column was posted on 6/29/2009. Check back next week to see another "Between Friends!" question and answer. It could be yours!

dear Between Friends


Click here to Get Friendship Advice

New BFF Or Old?

I have a best friend that I really don't want to be best friends with. My new friend is just like me and she considers me her best friend. I really like my new friend, and I think she is a better friend than my best friend is. But my best friend, Emily, is weirdly overprotective when it comes to being my best friend, and sometimes she gets annoyed when my new friend, Tara, and I hang out. Emily is nice and funny, but she can't keep a secret, while Tara is really nice and funny and I can tell her anything. I want to tell Emily, but I don't want to hurt her feelings. I told Tara that I like her more, but I don't know what to do. Help Me! – Siobhan, 12, New Jersey


I had the same problem a couple of months ago with my best friend. She was getting really jealous of my two new best friends for a while because she didn’t know them and she felt protective over me. This was understandable since we were friends for so long. At the start she couldn’t keep a secret either, but she’s learned. So my advice to you would be to sit down with your old best friend first and remind her you will always be there for her and introduce her to your new best friend and make her feel welcome. Then she’ll understand that you are both going to need space and sooner or later have different friends but she will always be your best friend this way nobody gets hurt and your happy because you get to tell your new best friend your secrets and your old best friend will still have you when she needs you. – Melissa, 17, Ireland

You can’t just totally discard your bestie. She has feelings too and you cant tell her that you don’t like her as much as Tara. Maybe try telling her that you want to be friends with Tara and that you could have two best friends. Do it somewhere private and try to break it gently. You never know maybe Tara and Emily could be friends too. – Lucy, 14, New Zealand

I think your friend Emily is a very insecure possessive person. She wants you all to herself. I had a friend like that and you want to know what it is? She’s insecure and possessive so she feeds off you to make up for the things she lacks. I would advise you to stay friends with her, but say to her "listen you don't own me and I really like Tara. She’s a lovely person and so are you, and if you don’t want me to have other friends then I'm sorry but I can’t stay friends with you." Honestly, friends like that are not true friends. Please trust me when I say that. – Bianka, 17, United Kingdom


Pssst!

Pssst! Our advice columnists can't answer every question personally. But we do our best to pick and answer questions representative of all our reader's problems. Is this an emergency? Need advice FAST?

  1. Here's a list of telephone help lines from PBS - Help's Around the Corner!
  2. Contact Teen Line Online: Teens Helping Teens
  3. Check out the National Runaway Switchboard
  4. Get in touch with other girls and talk it over - in our Circle of Friends PenPal Club!
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