Let’s face it: first dates can be nerve-wracking. As a woman, there’s a lot of pressure to look your best, sound intelligent and keep up an interesting conversation all at the same time. Thankfully, there are a few surefire tips and tricks to help you avoid the awkward silences and the clumsy high-heels. With my advice, you’ll not only nail your first date; you’ll be on your way to Date #2 in no time at all!
Love Yourself First
First thing’s first: if you ever want to have a successful first date, or a successful relationship for that matter, you need to make peace with your insecurities. A healthy relationship will never form between two people who are looking for someone to complete them. Instead, look for someone who complements your whole wonderful self – not someone to be your “better half.” And if ultimately, learning to love yourself and your body for who you are is too daunting a task, you can always seek treatments like talk therapy or surgery (find more information here) to help boost your confidence.
Avoid Asking Too Many Questions
When it comes to the first date that feels like an interview, we’ve all been there, done that. Asking too many questions on a first date can quickly take the tone from a romantic rendezvous to a dramatic interrogation. It’s even scientifically-proven that the more questions a couple asks each other on the first date, the less connected they feel to one another. Instead of playing the 20 Questions game, try talking about yourself and encouraging him to chime in when he feels compelled, since the couples studied tended to hit it off more when women talked about themselves using “I” and “my” statements and when men talked about the women using “you” and “your.”
Offer to Split the Check
I know, I know: this advice goes against everything you’ve ever heard, right? After all, we grew up with our mothers and grandmothers telling us that a gentleman should always pay on the first date. But it’s 2017 now, and offering to split the check with your man shows him that you’re a strong, successful woman who values her independence. So, offer to split the check, or to pay for the second date if he truly insists. Additionally, if you’re not sure how much is too much on his dime, ask him what he’s getting off the menu and choose a dish around the same price.
Keep an Open Mind
Women are much pickier than men when it comes to dating – and I’m not just saying that to be cocky. In a study conducted by sociologists at Stanford University, researchers found that women were much less likely to indicate interest in a second date than men. So, if you’re craving a guy you’d want to go on a second date with, what’s a gal to do? I would advise you simply to keep an open mind. If you find yourself coming to snap judgments about a guy you’ve just met, ask yourself where those judgments are really coming from. After a bit of thought, you might find yourself more interested in a second date – and surprised by just how much you learn about your dating style in the process.
And there you have it: if you want to nail a first date, simply follow these tips to harness your confidence, own your independence and come in with an open mind. Soon enough, you’ll meet the man (or woman) of your dreams and get swept off your feet – but until then, continue to persevere and I promise you will find the happiness you deserve.