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This column was posted on 12/24/2002. Check back next week to see another "Tuff Talk!" question and answer. It could be yours!

"Tuff" Girls Threatened My Gal Pal!

The other day, a girl on my bus was being threatened by some girls who thought that they were better than her. They said that they were going to kill her, and everybody thought that they were joking but I know that they were serious. This girl is really scared, and she doesn't want to tell an adult or anyone. Should I tell someone or do what she wants me to do? Is there something we can do to stop these girls? - Charlotte, 14, New York

"Hey, Charlotte!" I appreciate how you care about this girl in danger and want to help her. I know that this girl must feel scared, and she probably thinks that if she tells on them, they will kill her. Even though she is scared you must tell an adult immediately. Keeping quiet is what the girls want her to do, only so adults won't stop them from hurting her.

The only way to protect her, is to get an adult involved. Adults know how to handle these problems and they can protect her from danger. You should always take a threat seriously and I am proud that you have. Even if they appeared to be joking to others, they still might try to hurt her.

When you tell an adult and she finds out, she will most likely feel hurt and betrayed, but wouldn't you rather have her hurt emotionally than physically? After the adults handle this and she is safe, she will realize what you did for her was the right thing. When you approach an adult I suggest you tell about the threat to her parents first. Then you should tell the principal or guidance counselor. They are the most important because they will know how to react. The parents might inform the police which can protect her the most.

Also when you tell adults about the problem ask them not to mention your name to the girls if they confront them. Otherwise they might try to threaten or harm you. The only way to stop these girls is to get a responsible adult to talk to them. Once again I want to thank you foryour bravery and courage and I wish you the best of luck to help you do the right thing!

Sarah, 13, Maryland